Espresso Shot 22: My Stress Reaction!

Join Nicoa in the middle of her very own REAL  and AUTHENTIC "I am so tired!" STRESS REACTION! She thoughtfully and expertly shares what stressors are, where they come from, and tips for how to manage them. But most importantly, how she chose to cope and validate her own feelings! YOU WILL BE AMAZED about an ANGEL CARD DECK reading that validated her exactly how she needed it!
And we gotta ask,  can YOU relate? 

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Nicoa Coach: 0:02

sometimes don't you just need a quick moment of inspiration. Or maybe you just need a moment of caffeinated contemplation to reflect on life. That's the idea behind my weekly coffee with Nicola espresso shots. I'll be sharing short jolts of inspiration in each clip, in addition to my longer Coffee with Nicoa interview episodes, make sure to subscribe so you never miss an espresso shot, or a full length Coffee with Nicoa interview created just for you. Ah, this is your espresso shot, and I am coming to you in a stress reaction. And I thought, You know what? Let me turn that microphone on. Let me turn that podcast recording on. Because I'm really weepy. And I'm tired. And I thought, let me tell them. Let me tell them what a stress reaction is. And maybe if you hear my stress reaction, it will give you a break about your own. And I'm just tired. And when we get triggered in our life, when things feel like they're not working, or you're overwhelmed, you are probably in a stress reaction, not your reality, not your truth, not what's possible, not what brings power to your purpose, but a stress reaction. So I often ask the question, What stresses you out to my clients. And they say things like, feeling out of control, having too many things to do. When other people don't show up for them the way they wish they would show up for them. feeling disappointed. Money can be a stressor, time can be a stressor. And those are all valid and real reasons. Other stressors can include basic primary needs, like if you think about Maslow's hierarchy of needs, where that foundational piece of the pyramid, the top part of the pyramid is self actualization. And the bottom is primary needs, like, how well are you eating? How well are you sleeping? Have you been exercising? Or have you been drinking enough water? Are you have you had an increase in alcohol intake? Things that can cause your body to go into a stress state? And therefore emotionally, you can be triggered more easily when you're in that stress state? Even I believe it's in Alcoholics Anonymous, they talk about halt. Are you hungry? Are you angry? Are you lonely? Or are you tired? Halt is a great way to test and ask yourself is this emotional reaction I'm having Is it because I'm Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired. And the last category of stressors are typically emotional cellular memories from your past. So some sort of trigger some sort of trauma, big T, little T doesn't matter. They say don't even reference the capitalization of your drama, or not. Because everybody's traumas are different. And they're all a big deal to your nervous system to your autonomic nervous system. So you might be being triggered by a past trauma. So I'll give you an example. When I was about seven years old, I can remember having breakfast once my parents were there. My brothers were there. We were out at a restaurant. We did this just about every Saturday morning. And I remember something funny was said and in Nicoa fashion, my my brother said something funny and I gonna fall. I mean, I'm laughing loud, my mouth is wide open, my head is thrown back, as you can imagine. And I remember my one of my brothers, I won't throw them won't throw the brother under the bus. But he leaned in and he said, Nikki, be quiet. Those people at that other table can hear you. And I remember shutting down. And I'm sure there were many times where I was too loud. And I was told to stop being so loud. But I learned a couple of things and became traumatized by those beliefs, these new beliefs one, Nicola, you're too much. being your authentic self is not okay, especially in public and you should be quiet. And to oh, by the way, you being loud and being too much. Oh, you're also responsible for what the other people at that table think of you. So I'm responsible for how they feel. Hmm, these are the beginning traumas of worrying about what people think. You know, I mean, I'm not suggesting that I should have been laughing so loud and running through the restaurant. aren't bothering people. But I am suggesting that I was beginning to be brainwashed to believe that being loud is not good. It's too much if you laugh authentically. And oh, by the way, you need to worry about other people. So, these are all categories of stressors. And then what tends to happen is, when you are in your stress reaction, either because you're tired, you're hungry, you're angry, you're lonely, you're traumatized, you're triggered, you're simply you haven't had enough water or you haven't had a nap. Ah, you, you tend to see these things in your life explodes, like a bill comes and you're overwhelmed by money worries, or, in my case, I began today, to feel like I just had emotional thinking about it. I began to feel like it's just not enough, I'm just not doing enough. And that does tend to be the Gremlin on my shoulder that says, you need to do more, you're not doing enough. And the stress story that I began to tell was, Oh, my God, you're not posting enough on social media? How come? Things haven't just clicked yet? How come? The three e courses you made aren't making you any money? How come? You know you're not getting you haven't yet figured out? How to get someone to help you organize all of your social media, so that you can take it to that next level and have subscription based newsletters? Or how come you haven't yet gotten the podcast to a point where do you you know, how do you not know yet Nicoa How to do this, like get to the podcast where you have, everybody listens to the free stuff. And then you pay for a subscription so that you can listen to the extra, the extra stuff, the fun stuff, the extra parts of the interviews. I am not very patient with myself. And I'm so impatient. That while I was complaining and whining and being the victim, so an energy leadership, I was feeling very level one Woe is me. I've lost before I've even started. How come this is not coming together? How come? I haven't gotten this to fruition yet. I was telling my daughter and she's like, Mom, are you having fun? Do you still like it? Do you feel like you're making a difference? Do you sleep well at night knowing that you've made a difference? And the answer to those questions is yes. She's like, then just be patient. Just keep doing it. So I hear her and she's right. But I was still feeling like Woe is me. And for those of you who really really know me, I even pulled cards like I have angel cards that I'll pull just to try to get me back on track or to give me guidance. And I kid you not my angel cards today that I pulled from Archangel Gabrielle, from these are Doreen virtues cards. Listen to the cards that came from I'm not even going to read all of it, just the titles. So the message so clearly, I'm in a stress reaction. Because the messages that came, one card pops out, and it says open your heart to love. The more you open your heart and pour your love into your creations, the greater their lifeforce energy, that's validating. The next one says blocks lifted, previous obstacles came from fear, and they are now lifted away. And then two cards popped out as I was shuffling the deck. So if you don't know about card readings, you know, go look it up on YouTube. So I'm shuffling the deck shuffling the deck, right, you can hear the cards, and two cards just drop out. The first one says, keep going. Use the energy of any disappointments to fuel your creative project with authentic emotion. And ladies and gentlemen, that's why I'm talking to you right now. And the last card says authenticity. Trust that your real self, whom God created divinely perfect has the strength and knowledge needed. For this situation, it makes me want to cry because I'm just being reminded that I'm tired. That's it. Just keep going. Open my heart to the love that I know all of you are sending and that I am reminding myself of every day and to share with you my authenticity in my creative endeavor, which this is what this is. And to trust that those blocks have been lifted if I just keep going. So I hope you'll take this and apply it to your stress reactions in your life and in whatever endeavor that you think oh my god It's not is this going to be fruitless? No, I trust the journey. And I'm grateful for those cards. They were just what I needed. And I hope that you can take them and apply them to your endeavors this week into your life. And when you're stressed, ask yourself, Am I just Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired? And right now I'm tired having just moved my daughter into her first apartment, and I have lots of work to catch up on. And I'm also hungry. So my sweet husband has invited me out on a date. We're gonna go have half price burgers and beers at cut and pour so yay. I'm just gonna keep going and I hope you will too. Coffee with Nicoa This is your espresso shot for the week. Love you guys. Make sure to subscribe so you never miss an espresso shot or a full length Coffee with Nicoa interview created just for you firecracker burning and scuffle hands on