S2 EP17: LIZZ RANTZE

Nicoa gets a little star struck with the fun and fabulous STORY TELLER and CONTENT CREATOR  Lizz Rantze. What is so cool is that this is actualy Lizz's inaugural podcast interview after going viral on TikTok and Nicoa is super excited she said yes when asked about her LIFE BY DESIGN! There are a LOT of jewels in this one - LISTEN IN NOW!


Mark Manson article referenced: https://markmanson.net/life-purpose

“The universe buries strange jewels deep within us all, and then stands back to see if we can find them.”  ~BIG MAGIC by author Liz Gilbert

"Your soul takes on the color of your thoughts!" ~ Marcus Aurelius

As A Man Thinketh by author James Allen

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Transcript

Nicoa Coach: 0:01

Grab your coffee and join me Nicoa For a caffeinated conversation about life. I'll be talking to people who have chosen to walk their own paths and just like me, are creating a life by design. I hope that will give you the inspiration you need to do exactly the same. Okay, you guys, I'm about to introduce you to a really cool chick off of Tiktok. Are we allowed to say chick anymore? That's probably bad. I don't know.

LIZZ RANTZE: 0:32

I don't know about that one. Let's do some research.

Nicoa Coach: 0:35

We should. Felicia collusion is whether or not that's politically correct or not anymore. We're not talking about chickens on a farm. Okay. Let's first show off our equipment. Yes, so people can't see us. But we were very impressed that we both had really fancy mics. I have the Blue Yeti mic sponsorship. And what kind of mic Do you have live?

LIZZ RANTZE: 0:57

I have the shore M seven. M seven something v m seven.

Nicoa Coach: 1:03

That sounds very, very, you know spy like, Okay, everybody, welcome to Coffee with Nicoa Thank you guys for watching. It's been like we're in season two now. And I am just so excited. Because it was my it was my fans. Liz that helped me find you. Because the way I found Liz rants, everybody write this down as li ZZ and please is this really your name? rants r a n T ZE?

LIZZ RANTZE: 1:30

That's my name.

Nicoa Coach: 1:31

Do you rant a lot? I mean, this is really the question.

LIZZ RANTZE: 1:35

I mean, kind of

Nicoa Coach: 1:37

you can find a lineage of rants of ranters ranters right there.

LIZZ RANTZE: 1:43

We've been ranting through the land. That's so

Nicoa Coach: 1:46

cool. So Liz rants the way I Found You was that at least you know, I have about a dozen fans. So at least four of them saw your reminder. You design your life video on Tiktok. And I mean, I kept getting it and I'm like, Who is this chick? And I went back to look at it earlier today. And guess what? I'd seen it a million times. But I had forgotten to heart it. So I hearted you today.

LIZZ RANTZE: 2:13

Thank you. Thank you so much.

Nicoa Coach: 2:16

You're so welcome all my life designers out there aisle 12 of you will remember that. Thank you

LIZZ RANTZE: 2:21

all 12 Hey, everyone counts. I'm still surprised that one person has seen my video. So hey,

Nicoa Coach: 2:28

you know not Oh my gosh. Okay, everybody, here's the quick overview. And as you can tell, we're gonna go down some rabbit holes today. All right, so please welcome Liz Rance to Coffee with Nicoa. And this is her inaugural podcast interview. Yeah, she's a little bit nervous. Oh, right. We were going to do that ASMR on the mic.

LIZZ RANTZE: 2:51

It's very hard for me to not start imitating Tiktok people.

Nicoa Coach: 2:56

Those videos kind of scare me a little bit. But then you can't help you get more pulled in. You're like, What is she doing with your fingernails? Oh, sound and then you're like, stop no scroll scroll.

LIZZ RANTZE: 3:09

I know somehow it's soothing. And you're like, I don't want to be in this world. But hey, whatever floats your boat, whatever makes people happy. As long as it's not hurting anyone else. You know?

Nicoa Coach: 3:17

That's exactly right. Because you know what she designed her life and I have to say she was like getting all the monies or like run up on the side there with that one. Yeah, she was making a ton of money. Alright, so All right, and a storyteller and creator, you've spent the past two decades telling other people's stories until recently until about a year ago. Is that right?

LIZZ RANTZE: 3:38

Until about 2020 2020 That's

Nicoa Coach: 3:41

right we're gonna get that story that moment. She actually was it says you're barely employed as an actor and I She said nothing else you guys in the bio so I spent at least 15 minutes because you know, I do a lot of research. And I found your IMDB page

LIZZ RANTZE: 4:01

I wasn't expecting you to do any research.

Nicoa Coach: 4:05

What are you trying to say lose? Okay.

LIZZ RANTZE: 4:07

I'm so sorry under underestimated do but I was not counting for that.

Nicoa Coach: 4:12

So I found the one movie that she's known for which is Kaleidoscope which I found another show on Netflix called Kaleidoscope and I'm sitting there thinking that's not the same one.

LIZZ RANTZE: 4:22

No, that's so interesting, because actually, I was just an editor on that movie. The movie I was in was a movie called that list is like my biggest thing was Hancock with Will Smith and Charlize Theron. I was a nurse. And the only thing that made it in the movie was my hand. Oh, that was the peak.

Nicoa Coach: 4:45

Oh, show me your hands so we can put this on social. Okay.

LIZZ RANTZE: 4:50

You still getting residuals from these babies?

Nicoa Coach: 4:52

Oh heck yeah, I'm gonna have to pay you now. Oh, well, you need to update your IMDB because it's not on there. I know I It's your right hand in scene 58.

LIZZ RANTZE: 5:05

I know and then most of the other stuff was theater, so that wouldn't be on there.

Nicoa Coach: 5:09

Well, I can tell that you have a beautiful background of theatrics, because that is how you are really showing up in the social media world now on Tik Tok. You also, however, had this very successful company. You're in creative studio, which you also didn't tell me the name of, because I think you're moving a little bit towards this new world but I found rants and raves.

LIZZ RANTZE: 5:33

Absolutely named aptly

Nicoa Coach: 5:36

named I know you guys want to do and stuff for Dom Perignon and universal Kopari be social. I would not moments ago, I'm watching a Rihanna. Kiana video. Yeah, I'm like, Oh, okay. So pretty cool world. So it kind of threw me a bit thinking, huh. In part of your story, you're saying there was a moment where I was giving this all the way for other people? And I was doing it for others. But if you had your own business, how is that different? Tell us your story. And what was it about that life before the new life? We're going to talk about your new life by design? And may I say, because you'd like to use the phrase magic in the mundane? May I ask was it mundane and not magical? What was going on?

LIZZ RANTZE: 6:29

You know, it's one of those things, it's a little bit of a long story. So bear with me,

Nicoa Coach: 6:34

or we have time I have

LIZZ RANTZE: 6:38

start slipping. But basically, what happened was I had a lot of things going for me, basically, in 2020, I had this company that I had been running for a decade, and things were going really well. I was working, we specialized in video production and building brand identities. So I was working with a lot of different brands, doing a lot of branded content. And I loved what I did, genuinely I also separately in my personal life, I was an am married to a wonderful man. And we were building a house together. And then I was pushing 4020 20 hit. And suddenly I'm looking at all these wonderful things in my life. And I'm also the same time probably the most mentally and physically unhealthy. I'd ever been to the point where I didn't even really recognize myself in the mirror. And I've just thought to myself, I'm not happy. I'm not. And not only am I not happy, but the very scary thought of like, I don't know what I'm doing this for I don't know, my purpose anymore. So I had to really look at myself now we're in 2020, we had nothing to do.

Nicoa Coach: 7:46

But look at ourselves,

LIZZ RANTZE: 7:49

pandemic. So I'm sitting here I'm thinking, and I also have this pit this like deep pit in my stomach, if there's something that I really should be doing, and I'm not doing it, and also I have no idea what it is and how am I going to find it. So life design, totally stumbled upon on accident. I was in the middle. So it's 2020 we are going to be moving into this house that we're building. And I was cleaning out some boxes. I was in this headspace of like, how am I going to do this? How do I even changed my life where you know, and I came across a journal that I keep on my desk here that and I was just kind of looking through it. It was old quotes that I had like scribbled and I saw one that said you design yourself. And it was from Jay Z. Oh,

Nicoa Coach: 8:34

right. I was like, Where is your words? Yeah, you design yourself. Yeah.

LIZZ RANTZE: 8:39

It was from Jay Z, who I had made a present for one of my friends birthdays, like a decade ago. And I was like, oh, that's kind of cool that he said that. And I wrote it down not thinking think about it again. And then when I read it that time at that moment, it was one of those the clouds parted, the light came down. Like I was like, This is what I have not been doing. I have been chasing my to do list for the past decade. And I have not actively been choosing the direction of my life or even asking myself what do I want? You know?

Nicoa Coach: 9:08

Yeah, number one question. Yeah. So one, when you read that, so when you ask yourself the question, did you have any answers?

LIZZ RANTZE: 9:18

No. That's a very scary place to be and I squaring but also also kind of fascinating because you're for the first time in my life, I did not see where I was going. And I still kind of not I have more of a direction now I have my purpose but I still purposefully don't exactly know where I'm going because I think that's what got me in trouble. And you know, putting myself in this box of like this is this is the steps I follow and this is what I have to do next and that Allah Allah and then I was like now I'm miserable.

Nicoa Coach: 9:51

So I very commonplace to be by the way I was there as well. I had the American Dream checklist and a lot of my clients come to me and they're like I'm doing Doing everything they said to do. I mean, it's really system is systemic and cultural. And it's, it's not going away fast enough, in my opinion, this pressure. And so that's one of the reasons we have these interviews is so that we can talk to people about, well, how did you break the habits? How did you change the course? So you talk about systematically changing the direction of your life? Where did you start?

LIZZ RANTZE: 11:18

So this is fascinating. They always say, you know, like, write what you know. And I was like, Okay, I'm going to start with what I know, which is building brand identities. When you're building a brand identity, the first thing you do is a period called discovery. And that's really, there's a whole questionnaire that we go through. And you really are kind of mining the details of what the brand likes who they are deep, deep discussions. And I saw that and I was like, hmm, what if I took this idea of discovery, and I just turned it into, like, personal discovery. So I kind of followed the same steps, but I tailored it the questions more to myself. So I like audited my life. I started there. And then I followed a series of different steps that I kind of made up. And actually, I don't know if you've seen on my Tic Toc, there's a series called ways I'm designing life.

Nicoa Coach: 12:13

Some Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So those

LIZZ RANTZE: 12:17

are the steps I took. I basically created that series out of those steps. So I mean, I want

Nicoa Coach: 12:23

everybody pause right now and go follow her on Tik Tok and on Instagram. Thank you at Liz Rance. Okay, you got it.

LIZZ RANTZE: 12:30

You're hired. Yeah, so so that's where I started and the steps really, I had to start on the baseline, I did not know, I had lost myself. That was the other scary thing. Like I was like, I don't know who I am anymore. I don't know what I want or who I am. So I had to start at the baseline. I like took a personality test. I was reading books trying to learn how do I learn? I was really starting from the beginning to really get to know myself to rebuild the trust with myself to find out where my passion still lied. Did I still love what I was doing? I did but was it that that I loved? Or was it a different aspect of it? You know what I mean? I had to get very specific. And I was consuming anything and everything I thought would help me books, podcasts. One day, I was literally Googling, how do you find your purpose like online? And this Mark Manson? I know it works. But this Mark Manson article came up who which I love I'll send you the link. Yeah. And he asked two questions that kind of gave me a little bit of a direction. One of them was how do you want to be remembered when you're gone? And that to me was like, I have never thought about the legacy that I'm leaving. And the second one was in Hindi. You know, this is his funny way. But what are you doing to save the world? And I thought that I just got chills again when I said that, me

Nicoa Coach: 13:57

to that.

LIZZ RANTZE: 14:02

Question. Cuz you know, again, just to give you context, so we're in 2020. So people's health, the well being community, social unrest, all of that stuff is top of mind. And I was like, that's what I'm missing. I don't know. If I'm contributing anything. I don't know if I can contribute anything. What can I do with these skill sets? I'm only qualified to be a creative. Can I do something with that? And that kind of got the ball rolling to start this whole journey? Oh,

Nicoa Coach: 14:28

my God, that's fantastic. I'm curious, though, along those paths, a lot of people have the, the I'm broken, I'm sad. I'm on on unsatisfied, you know? And then how did you really motivate yourself to begin doing that homework? I mean, what was the rock bottom? And or was it was it your husband? That was like the sounding board to help you get up off your ass and go do this to get out of the funk? Or did you have other people supporting you?

LIZZ RANTZE: 14:57

My husband has been, I can't even describe and I'll start tearing up, I think about how supportive he's been. Because I literally was at my like, when I look at pictures of myself from then I'm like, he's still loved me through all the phases. So he's he Yes, he's been a huge, huge help during this whole thing and a huge rock and support. But with that said, the only way I was going to change anything is if I did it, and I realized that and I also was like, Okay, you're here now? Do you want to stay here? I feel like my health like, I feel like you're not going to live very long. You know, I feel like you're gonna be miserable. There's a path that you're going down that we can keep going. But I don't you don't want to like I felt that was the thing. I was like, I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to feel this way anymore. Want to feel better? And I want to see what that looks like.

Nicoa Coach: 15:52

Yeah, what's an example of something you change right away, like, you're like, you know what, I'm going to stop doing X.

LIZZ RANTZE: 16:01

Something it's been so gradual. I mean, let me try to give you a concrete something here. You know, what I started doing right away, I started being very conscious of what I was consuming. I really believe that you hear that thing that you're kind of the average of the five people you hang out with. But I believe you're also the average of what you're the five accounts you're following the most the TV shows, you're watching the books, you're reading, all of that influences you and your brain, even if you don't realize it. And that's something I started being conscious of, I just started surrounding myself with these brilliant people who were smarter than myself, you know, online, everything was online, because it was COVID. Um, but you know, it's just my husband and I sitting in our house. So I'm like, but thank God for the internet. I mean, we have so much access to these brilliant minds that we have a chance to take advantage of, and I just, I just started there.

Nicoa Coach: 17:02

I think that's really critical. Because, you know, like, energy attracts, attracts like energy, and I talk a lot about energy leadership in the work that I do with my clients. And, and if you are, even, we'll watch shows before going to bed at night sometimes. And if it's negative, or, you know, I can't watch any of those reality TV shows about about seven years ago, those housewife shows, we would, I would, that would be on and I can remember sitting there and I'm like, I have to leave the room. I can't, I can't experience this catabolic energy any longer. I had to repel it. And so you know, obviously accounts like yours, just make me happy and smile. And I think you you're already doing the you know, how do you want to be remembered? How do you want to save the world? You're raising the vibration? In my opinion, those are that's language I like, you know, frequency, and how can we be very anabolic, which is a scientific term for growth and lightness and lighten up. Talk to us about this. You've I look, first of all, I also want to commend you, you took what you knew the structure of what was making you successful in your business, and you applied it to yourself, we rarely do that. People don't think they have the skills. And I'm like, use what you know, you have a structure because guess what? You've been designing your life since you were a little kid. You just didn't do it consciously. You want to design it. Oh, I want to do that. Okay. Oh, I don't like that. Okay, that's designing so commending you. I just want to thank you for what you're doing. Tell everybody what you're doing. Because I want to talk about the behind the scenes and it's so fun to watch you.

LIZZ RANTZE: 18:46

Thank you. Well, first of all, thank you for for even saying that. I appreciate that. Yeah, I kind of as I was trying to find my purpose. And as I was thinking, ruminating on the how am I saving the world? And what can I contribute? I was I was just thinking, how much I love storytelling, and how that's such a big part of my life. And that's what attracted me to everything I've done in my life. You know, I started young, dancing, and then that kind of morphed into theater and then that morphed into video production and editing and then that morphed into me starting my own creative company. And then

Nicoa Coach: 19:22

I think I remember something you told me that we must share with the world. Did you want to do this? Or did you actually were you a backup dancer for Janet Jackson? Or did you just say that because you wanted to be a backup.

LIZZ RANTZE: 19:34

That was a dream and I don't even know how you found that.

Nicoa Coach: 19:38

Claire was awesome. I don't remember oh

LIZZ RANTZE: 19:43

my goodness. You're awesome. Yes. When I was little that was it. I was like Okay, so here's what I'm doing. I'm going to be a backup dancer for Janet Jackson. And then during the week I'll be a veterinarian and when I was like done that's it

Nicoa Coach: 19:54

Mic drop. Oh, yeah, that's don't drop the new mics. Okay, sorry. Not that awesome. I love that so much.

LIZZ RANTZE: 20:04

I was not it didn't work out but I did that was she was my my everything. Yes, that's her dance is where it all started dance and music videos I had. I mean, I'm kind of going off topic here for a second

Nicoa Coach: 20:18

matter are people that listen to this account. They love all these stories. So you go ahead. Okay.

LIZZ RANTZE: 20:25

When I was little I was an only child. So my imagination. You know, you're alone a lot. My parents kept me very busy, but you're still alone often and so my imagination just went crazy. And I remember seeing a Michael Jackson music video. I know how we feel about Michael Jackson but, but he created these music videos in the 80s that were game changers. And I remember seeing one of my jaw was just on the floor. This is a thing mixing dance music and video, like, you can make little mini movies like, blew my mind completely loaded. And so since that point, like when I was little, I would just have these videos play in my brain, they would just come to me. And I would I couldn't do anything about it. I couldn't imagine it, but I couldn't do anything about it. And I think now I'm at this weird intersection, where I still have those things still download and but now I actually have built the skill and the experience to make it a reality. So I was thinking about all these things, and you know, finding my own passions when I was young and, and knowing that I wanted to do something to kind of help the world in some way. And I thought, What if I just start making these videos that I love to make? And just start putting them out there and see if anyone cares? Let's just start there. So I started with my 200 family and friends on Instagram, I would just put something out and I'd see if there was any feedback that resonated with one person I'd be like, Okay, keep going. So I did that for a little while and then on in 2022, I believe I started posting on Tik Tok. And here we

Nicoa Coach: 21:55

are wild. And you show these videos like which one really took off there was the one where you dress up like the witch and you it's like Halloween, like she's a witch. But then it's the different seasons and then Halloween comes and oh, I just love it so much. And with a little girl walks past you and you give her the wink. Oh my god, it's just the best and that must have taken you like a month or more. How long did it take? Note

LIZZ RANTZE: 22:22

that? I mean? Yeah, it should have taken me a month but I didn't have the time. Nor did all my generous family and friends who I roped into doing that video half the time so no, I did that. Start to finish. I think I had to get that done within like 10 days. Oh my gosh. It was it was a one though that and that wasn't ideal because there was nights. This is when I was like I'm not designing my life. Right? Because I was up till like Cory I'm gonna finish the edits I posted before Halloween. But ya know that video so I got very lucky. The second video I posted on tick tock went a little bit viral. And then like the cover video, couple videos later went a little bit viral. So I had a following kind of quickly. But the video you're talking about was the which video I posted this past Halloween and that one went out. I mean, it took on a life of completely of its own. And I'm still blown away because it's a two and a half minute video on JSOC. It's

Nicoa Coach: 23:20

an AI everyone just paused again. And they went to look for it. Yeah, I love that. Right. So what's been really fun for me to watch you is that you also share with us the behind the scenes after the fact. So you do the video and I was like, Oh, you're so cool. And then like the one of y'all dancing in the in the grocery store. That was so cool. Anyway, so you you showed us the behind the scenes and then the Christmas one. Clearly I'm stalking you. You sure that behind the scenes and all I can. So in my life by design was I was like, holy shit. I don't want to do any of that. I can't believe she spent all that energy. My videos are like, I think I'll talk without putting makeup on for 10 minutes and see what people think. So how in the world and you've got your husband, which I'll do clear out the house so you can decorate so you could do like the magic. Okay, no one knows what I'm talking about now.

LIZZ RANTZE: 24:16

Yeah, so you might need to pause and just take a look. So you can see some of these quirky videos I'm putting out there. But yes, the holidays are big around here. I get decorate the house. The house is kind of a whole other character. I feel like in my videos. But my Yeah, the holidays are not around here. How do you do

Nicoa Coach: 24:35

that? Like, I mean, I guess you just do it. It's just part of your life. Because clearly you can't do this work that you're doing without your husband being 100% on board. I mean, does he work from home as well? And

LIZZ RANTZE: 24:49

yeah, but this is important to note he a few things one when I started and I was like, Hey, I'm thinking about doing this and posting stuff. He was like, okay, like we had to have kind of a family conversation about it. I have very clear boundaries with him of if he wants to you don't see him in most things because he's not really into it. He's super supportive, but he's like, I don't really feel like being on camera. But he's also in production. He has his own production company. He works mainly in sports and music. Shout out to life in a van productions.

Nicoa Coach: 25:18

Okay, put that in the show notes. In the show notes.

LIZZ RANTZE: 25:22

He's incredibly talented, but he does not have the time for me and my shenanigans every day. That's mostly me. We do have talks I'll be like I'm you know, I'm shooting in this part of the house today. And we'll we'll just keep the communication going about what's happening and then obviously during the holidays Yes, so yeah, he's he's the handyman for setting up all those decorations for sure.

Nicoa Coach: 25:43

Well, that's an important part of this whole story too. So when you have a life by design, usually There are people in your world, whether they're a partner or they're just family or extended friends and, and you really have to know how to share with them what you need from them. And like you said boundary setting, we had to have an upfront conversation. You know, I'm in the midst of moving my mother from her home in Brevard for 15 years here to an independent living facility. And we had a session with a coach the two of us together. And the coach suggested that we create our contract because now I'm going to be her primary contact for helping care for her while she's here. So we're going to we've first of all, so far, our contract is a I love you and you love me, Pinky swear, that's where we are now, we haven't written anything down. But we're gonna start talking about it right. And so I'm really glad you brought that up about you and your husband. Sometimes we make assumptions, and we just do our thing. And then the partner is like, Excuse me, you keep pulling out your phone to videotape dinner. I mean, I'm speaking for a friend. But

LIZZ RANTZE: 26:50

no, it's true. But you know, I also learned that I won't say that it was perfect when it started. And it still is evolving, because there's still some things that I'm like, Oh, well, you're not comfortable with that. I didn't know that. So we have to adjust something, or Oh, you aren't comfortable with this. So it's continually evolving. But that communication has been very, very important. Because what I'm doing is also not, there's no sort of path and following. It's very weird to say this is what I'm doing. Now, you know, people have opinions when you're 41 years old, and you say I'm a content creator. You know,

Nicoa Coach: 27:24

what kind of opinions I mean, to me, it seems like that's kind of the thing these days for a lot of people do you no longer work with? What is it? rants and raves? I mean, do you still have that business in play, or

LIZZ RANTZE: 27:38

I still have the business. i It's, for the past year, mainly, this was my focus. Yeah, kind of on purpose, because I want to give this a chance to see where it's going. This is all part of me, you know, not following the path exactly that I was on. And also, I'm so much happier. At the moment. Things like this opportunity have started coming up. And so as doors keep opening, I'm like, I'm just going to keep going through them. And I've been, you know, fortunate enough that my husband and I are able to do this, you know, right now I'm able to kind of pursue my passion and see where it goes. Well,

Nicoa Coach: 28:19

I'm glad that to hear that you're happy. I'd love for you to describe the difference between how you felt in 2020 compared to how you feel now, in 2024. Wow.

LIZZ RANTZE: 28:32

Hmm, big changes. Some of them are amazing. Some of them aren't sexy, some of them are like, I started eating better, I started working out more I started, you know, all this, like going to bed at a decent hour, like the very boring basic things that we probably all should be doing. I had to kind of prioritize. But I would say you know, I had, I had a wonderful life, I had a great experiences. But how I would describe it is now I can find the joy in every mundane day. Whereas before I would have joy and then it could be six months. And then I'd have another situation of joy. Now I'm a little more. I'm able to handle things a little differently. I have the discipline to be open to opportunities to make space for those opportunities. And there was a great book during this whole process that are read by it's called Big Magic by Liz Gilbert.

Nicoa Coach: 29:32

Love read it.

LIZZ RANTZE: 29:35

But she has a quote, right. It's amazing. In the in the book, she writes a quote that says and I hope I don't butcher it, but the universe buries strange jewels deep within us all, and then stands back to see if we can find them. And I read that and I was like that's yeah, that's it. I just I feel like now I'm I'm finding the jewels. I'm starting to be like this is this is there's something here. Let's keep going that way.

Nicoa Coach: 30:04

Yeah. And you know, you said something in the very beginning where you said something like, Well, how's that going to do it? How's it going to figure this out? I was just a creator, just a creator. Are you kidding me? That's the whole point of the age of the Aquarius, like we're supposed to be waking up that feminine energetic side of us that is the creator to be creative. The previous world even though you were creating you were not necessarily aligned with your own creativity. You were learning skills and applying them to help create content for other people. But now you're like waking up probably in the middle of the night saying I could totally paint this decoration and put it around the doorframe and that'll be an amazing little pop when we do the video about Christmas. As decorate,

LIZZ RANTZE: 30:51

yes, the ideas come most of the time in the shower. But yes, they're all Yeah. That's

Nicoa Coach: 30:57

showers are good water is actually a great way to find answers. So putting yourself in the shower, that's a great activity. You don't let's talk about self care and self dialog, maybe start first with self dialog. So you're like, Yeah, I had to do some things that weren't so sexy. Well, how do you add it, you change the conversation with yourself? Because that really is a big part of this right? What am I going to say to myself, and I'm laying in the bed thinking, well, I want to go work out but really don't want to go work out? Like how did you change that conversation?

LIZZ RANTZE: 31:31

In the beginning, and also, you know, I've had a few health, little blips in the past four years. So some of it was like, You got to do it, girl, this is the you don't really have a choice. You have to do it. So some of it is that, but it's not easy. It's the willpower. That's something that you know, I'm not gonna sit here and pretend that I've mastered it because I haven't every day. I'm working on it. I call in the morning. I don't know if this was politically correct. It's probably not but I call it my morning lobotomy, I do like meditation, a journal session. And I kind of get my mind straight and ready to go for the day. So things like that have have helped me to in the talking to myself, because if I start talking to myself negatively, most of the time, I just journal it out. And I'm like, Okay, you're it's out now. Like, it's

Nicoa Coach: 32:23

Better out than Better out than in? Yeah, yes. So

LIZZ RANTZE: 32:27

I struggle with anxiety. And I have for many years. And so that's a conversation also that I've been having with myself for a long time. So I will say I have a lot of tools through a lot of years of therapy that just helped me get out of the spaces when I can see myself starting to get into a rut of like, I can't do this or the you know, the thoughts that you start telling yourself. That's been helpful.

Nicoa Coach: 32:53

Good. Good for you. I'm glad you went to therapy. And do you still go to therapy? Oh,

LIZZ RANTZE: 32:57

yeah, I think. I think it's it I think it's happening for.

Nicoa Coach: 33:03

Right, so yeah, it's just like an ongoing, it's part of our world, right. It's part of our support team. So I always think that a life by design is therapy or counseling plus coaching. Because counseling is great, it helps us heal and we're removing all the historic traumas, traumas, whatever lamas, you know. And then in the coaching world, or like we're creating, and we're co creating something to move forward towards something to celebrate, and something to really, you know, design. So I'm really excited that you shared that it's important for us to continue to remind people that it's, it's okay to ask for help. And to go online. I know, it's, it's like the hot girlfriend on your arm, the the arm candy is therapy right now. But seriously, dudes, and guys and gals, and everybody, please go get some therapy. And this might

LIZZ RANTZE: 33:54

be helpful for people that are thinking, you know, sometimes there's a stigma around it. I'm in California. So I mean, it's like going to the grocery store for us.

Nicoa Coach: 34:04

I'm in North Carolina, it's not?

LIZZ RANTZE: 34:08

Well, for that, I describe it to people who are like, have a stigma around it. I'm like, All they're doing is giving you tools in your toolbox to be able to handle this life better. That's, that's all it is. And it's also just relieving some of the crap you're carrying. Like you're hearing, whatever trauma you have, or even just the thoughts that you're having. You're carrying that around with you like in a backpack all day. And this is just a way to release that. And it is so helpful.

Nicoa Coach: 34:37

So I think people get confused with carrying this as either a part of their identity. Well, this happened to me, so I have to carry it as who I am. I'm this way. Or they can they confuse carrying with carrying. Right. And I've said this before, but Well, I have to carry the burden of you know, climate change so that people know I care. But that's not actually the case. You can carry it enough to take action, but you don't have to carry it all day long. You know, if you say no to the straw when they bring the water, okay, that's one step towards you know, taking action, but that don't have to feel guilty because a straw was made. You know? You don't I mean, I don't know if that was a good analogy.

LIZZ RANTZE: 35:21

Really good point. Yes, that's true. The things we see gone daily. There's another I'm also into, I really feel like we're jumping around I hope I'm doing this thing, right. This is my first podcast.

Nicoa Coach: 35:33

Did you not listen to all my interviews? They're all like this today.

LIZZ RANTZE: 35:40

Love it. So what's the other thing? The other thing that's helped me especially with anxiety through the therapy through all that stuff is there's no If you're familiar with stoic philosophy, most of the time they say

Nicoa Coach: 35:52

that following them give stoicism I started following it on Instagram and I kind of um resonated. Oh,

LIZZ RANTZE: 36:00

that's fascinating. Most of the time I say that and I watch people's eyes just glaze right on over. They're like that sounds. That sounds

Nicoa Coach: 36:09

realism in a way, it's realistic thinking of fact and isness. But without emotional attachment, I don't know, you tell me what it is?

LIZZ RANTZE: 36:18

Well, actually, it's more about feeling your emotions, and then knowing what to do with them. It Well, yeah. Yeah, I think a lot of people, I think that's where the confusion comes. And I think that's why people glaze over is they think that stoicism is cold, and it's about you not feeling anything and you're, you know, impenetrable. And it's actually it's actually more about these emotions are going to happen, all this stuff is going to happen, and how do you deal with it, and it's really giving you the discipline, to kind of live better, do better be better?

Nicoa Coach: 36:46

So I find it seeing the emotion, right, it's choosing it based on the circumstance, which is what I liked about it, right? I can decide I'm in an emotion. And then I can decide what where that emotion is, if it's going to serve me or not, like, what do I want to take this emotion don't want to change the emotion or want to sit with the emotion. Ya know, I'm, I like this conversation a lot. Because it's consciousness at the end of the day, if I'm aware, and I can observe how I'm feeling how I'm thinking, what I'm making the world mean, then I am in I'm the common denominator that's in control of creating my own life. So see, we're spot on with this topic. Keep going. Tell me more about what your thoughts are there. How that's

LIZZ RANTZE: 37:27

brought it up was because there's a there's a quote by Marcus Aurelius, who's one of arguably the best emperors and the Roman times, who ironically went through so many things that we all go through today. Like he went through a pandemic he went through, there's all these it's, it's fascinating to me that 2000 years ago, they were dealing with the same can I use a curse word on here? Yeah, we

Nicoa Coach: 37:49

cuss all the time here. Yeah,

LIZZ RANTZE: 37:50

go ahead. The same shit. Hey, we're dealing with today.

Nicoa Coach: 37:57

She's getting censored on Tik Tok. She didn't know what to do with herself. I don't

LIZZ RANTZE: 38:02

know. I'm just gonna just deep, deep, deep just cuss word Africa forward. But he said a quote that I read that is your soul takes on the color of your thoughts in that is something I carry with me on my daily is that beautiful? That is

Nicoa Coach: 38:18

so beautiful. I've never heard that when I love it so much.

LIZZ RANTZE: 38:22

Yeah, it's feel your soul takes on the color of your thoughts. And I think about that so much. I think about the energy I bring into a room. I think about what I'm talking to, you know, we're talking about how your inner dialogue this, this is exactly all about your inner dialogue like that. Whatever you're telling yourself is going to carry into your day how you treat other people how you talk to yourself. It's fascinating.

Nicoa Coach: 38:49

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Okay. And I did not plug that y'all she said all those things on her own? It is not me. I did exactly what I'm talking about that all the time. There was written. Yeah, all the time. I mean, it's all about. So a book that comes to mind is was written by James Allen, about 120 years ago, and it's called as a man thinketh now you can look in multiple religious texts. And so you know, as a man thinketh So is he as a woman thinketh. So as she so your thoughts create your reality? And if you know if your thoughts your soul takes on the color of your thoughts. Absolutely. You are the I always say it's either the most annoying thing, or the most liberating thing to realize that you are the common denominator. And that all of us, we all just showed up for you. You just brought us in to be in your world. It's not really about us. It's about you and what you're gonna make it mean so. So tell us more about what you're making your new life by design mean now, like what's really working well for you? And then is there some things you're still working on?

LIZZ RANTZE: 39:56

I'm 100% Still working on it. This is not a like I'm done. Oh, I finished. I'm perfect. Here we go. Watch me for

Nicoa Coach: 40:05

me. I think you're looking pretty perfect out there. You're so

LIZZ RANTZE: 40:08

sweet. You can hang out anytime. No, I Yes. There's so much more to do. I'm definitely not done with this. I will say I'm feeling so much more. I just can deal with things a lot better. And also, I'm more confident in myself and I also I think I'm happier because I'm back in touch with the things that made me happy as a kid I'm back in touch with the things that just make me happy in life in general.

Nicoa Coach: 40:38

What are some of those things that really make you super happy every day?

LIZZ RANTZE: 40:42

I mean, you see it all the time and tick tock the music movies Sun, sunlight being outside, finding magical moments in the mundane observing people and seeing how they interact, dancing, singing, you know, the whole

Nicoa Coach: 41:00

that are aware your your present. I mean, when you say sunlight and sunshine, that was the biggest thing that hit me I quit my job a long time ago. And I remember once on a Tuesday walking to a Starbucks to do some work, and it was 9am on a Tuesday, which I know that sounds weird to say this, but I was like, It's 9am on a Tuesday, and it's sunny, and I'm outside and I'm not in a big corporate building. And then I got to the Starbucks and I was like, how many? What do these people do? Like, how many people have a doctor's appointment today? Like, why are they all here? They'd already started waking up. They're like, oh, I want a life by design that it's flexible and free and, and I just so excited for you to have begun to really give yourself permission to play and I just had this image of you laughing in the doorway when your husband unveiled the blow up Christmas decorations. Oh, yeah. Why is there a dinosaur?

LIZZ RANTZE: 41:57

Oh my god. Steve, Steve, the Christmas Oris is what we ended up naming him. He didn't make it out this year. He'll be back next year. Oh,

Nicoa Coach: 42:06

that's right. Because you guys, you guys alternate years on decorate. So you're laughing and playing and and so yeah, I love this. Tell that story about how y'all y'all play like that? Plays

LIZZ RANTZE: 42:16

but yeah, so in our house, my husband and I have very different views of what Christmas looks like. His is you know, anything and everything. Christmas, not super curated. Things are just strung about and I'm super curated. I like there to kind of be a theme for the Christmas. I want everything to be beautiful. So I do we do want both of us to have the Christmas of our dreams. So we switch off year. So one year, it'll be his year. One year all decorate this year was my year. This coming year now is his year. So buckle up, ladies and gentlemen, who knows? Buckle

Nicoa Coach: 42:50

up buttercups. Well, you know, you use the word curated. And that's that aligns nicely with excuse me a life by design. I'm going to ask you to talk now I'd mentioned some I want to know about your self care, more intentional. And I'm curious. So I'm going to push maybe here a little bit. I know a lot of people who are very detail oriented in their life, and I have a history of being quite the perfectionist, right? When you say I am super curated. I'd be really curious how how I'm sure that really Foster's great content. How does that sneak into the old daily life? And does it ever get in the way? Oh,

LIZZ RANTZE: 43:33

yeah, you nailed this. I am such a perfectionist, and it drives not bonkers. It drives me and everyone I know, bonkers, I have to be super cautious about this is something I learned about myself in life by design is I if I'm into something, I'm going to give it 110% of my energy. And so I have to be very cautious about what I do. Because if I'm giving it 100%, then that means I'm also going to make it what I deem as perfect, not perfect, but you know, as close to it as I can get. And it's a problem. And it's not realistic. And it's held me back from things. It's it's made it so that I don't finish something that I started because it wasn't perfect. us today, there could have been a chance that a few years ago, I would not have done it because I would have been like I don't I can't control this. This is that's the other thing. Perfection. My therapist tells me. Perfection is the illusion of control.

Nicoa Coach: 44:30

Well, I will share. May I share our interaction since we first started this process? So yeah, please did love you. I love you. And I woke up thinking about this. I was like, Oh, I love this girl. I like you sent me this email. Well, first, I

LIZZ RANTZE: 44:46

will you please answer my 3000 Questions about the podcast. Thank you so much. Looking forward to it. Oh,

Nicoa Coach: 44:54

and that was after the could we have a quick call to actually talk about talking on a podcast which I bless your heart, right? This southern girl and God bless your heart. But that's okay. It's okay that you did those things. You have done about 85 interviews now. And I've only had to do that twice I love you and I you know what? Because it's a part of me. It's like, oh, let's just do it. So I'm like, wait, I used to be the control freak. But now in my life by design. I'm like going with the flow. It took me an hour to do all that research. I have all my notes. They're not organized. They're highlighted in different colors. I'm just showing you the difference now, when I still get the work done. I still like the standards that I hold for myself and I'm happier. So I want to interview you in a year. And I want to see how you've integrated more flow so that you aren't up till 3am forcing the final product or you're not having to over analyze and think about your interview with Nicoa. Right? Yeah. And then

LIZZ RANTZE: 46:08

that protecting part of it too, is that I put, especially in this instance, I just want to make sure that I'm providing two things. One, I think I'm having a bit of an impostor syndrome situation that, that you even wanted to interview me? And I'm like, am I worth interviewing? Is this gonna be any good? And then the second part of it is, I want to provide some sort of value to this, I don't just want to come on here and be a bump on a log. So that's where that comes from, too. Of course, it you know, but I knew that. Yeah, I think we all do.

Nicoa Coach: 46:41

I love that. I mean, because when I saw your questions, I was very busy at that moment with my mom. But I remember thinking, she needs me to respond to these questions thoughtfully, so that you could feel more comfortable and in control. And that's okay. And I think this example, I share it, I'm compelled to share it. Because a lot of people spend a lot of time judging other people's way of showing up in the world and saying, I don't have time to answer these. I mean, of course, I always have time, because I made my life very flexible. But I want people to recognize that sometimes you do things for other people, to help them feel more comfortable. And it's actually a gift to them. It's not you being put out or burdened, it's just as a phrase, some quote, I've been using a lot lately, it's not a burden, it's part of the dance. And I really enjoy this dance with you. And it was my honor to have you and of course, you're worthy of being on this podcast. I mean, I've interviewed everybody didn't read my brother, everybody's everybody's worthy. You were born worthy. You were brainwashed you forget that. And now that you're 4041, you're remembering again, it happens to everybody about this decade. So

LIZZ RANTZE: 47:56

you're beautiful. I'm so glad it happened, because it's an important thing. But thank you, I want to thank you both for for both. Explaining the perfectionist thing, that's a tough thing. That's something that I will still be working on. And you're my inspiration here with that. And also, I just lost my train of thought on that second, that's okay,

Nicoa Coach: 48:15

I was gonna have you tell us, it's clear to me that you put so much into those videos. It didn't surprise me at all, when you took a little sabbatical in January. Tell me about that. That's

LIZZ RANTZE: 48:28

part of my protecting my creativity, because the creativity is finite. I mean, it's a muscle. It's, it's, it doesn't, when I'm working that hard on something coming up with ideas, it does dry up if I'm also not able to take care of myself. So I build in these intermissions. That way, I'm not just burning out. And that goes also to the my whole reason for doing any of this is to provide value, some sort of value. And if I get tired, and I'm just doing it because I feel like I have to then I start putting out junk and my audience is better than that. I have high standards for them. And so I do I take time off. I'm sure I'm breaking some sort of social media rule by doing this, because I'll be Oh, now this is almost been a two month break. Because I've been doing some other behind the scenes. stuff. I'm working the whole time, but I'm just not posting. So it's yeah, it's but that's part of the life design, right? You have to figure out who you are, how you work, and be okay with that we all work differently.

Nicoa Coach: 49:27

And yeah, you can't get this thing called life wrong. You just can't, no matter what the algorithm says. And honestly, what are we hearing right now? 2024 for any kind of social media visibility, it's all about authenticity. So let's just be ourselves. How do you take care of yourself during those intermissions? Like, what? Because my invitation to everybody is to be as gluttonous as possible in moments for you like, I want you loving up on yourself so much, that the that you almost you'll get so fueled regularly, like flow throughout your day that you actually don't even need an intermission. You'll be like, Oh, alright, so let's take the month off. Okay, great. Right. How do you gluttonously Remind yourself that you are enough and that you're worthy and that you love yourself?

LIZZ RANTZE: 50:18

Hmm intermissions, or just every day? Yes.

Nicoa Coach: 50:22

Yes.

LIZZ RANTZE: 50:25

Well, I think by taking the intermissions I'm reminding myself of that, I think on the every day, you know what, I'm not so wonderful at celebrating myself. I think that feels kind of uncomfortable for me sometimes. So I think I just do the things that I know makes me feel good. I go for a walk, I get the sleep i read i I just make sure that every day I'm doing something to make me better that day, even if it's by half a percentage point, just something to make me a little bit better each day. And then like in the intermissions for the gluttonous part of it for the first week and a half of an intermission, I will do nothing. People asked me to do something, I say, No, I read a book for two days straight. I just go with whatever my impulses are. Because that's the only way that I'll recharge. I didn't realize how important rest is to all this. And actually, I was listening to in my research, I was listening to your episode with Jennifer battle set her new. Yes. Yeah, that was wonderful. That was such a great conversation. But she was stressed. And I was like, Yes, I was like, sitting here listening to it going. Yes, you nailed it. Like that's such an important part of things that I did not realize that it's so it's just as important as the work is the rest

Nicoa Coach: 51:48

it is it is and you know, rest and relaxation aren't just going to get your nails done or whatever. It's literally like, it makes me think of the Seinfeld episode. I think there it's Elaine Bennis is in there with I think Seinfeld and or, I don't know, one of the characters and they were like, What did you do this weekend? And she goes, nothing. And he goes, No, really like, what did you do? She goes, I did nothing. He's like, What do you mean, she was like, I sat in a chair and stared. I'm like, Yeah, I do that a lot more now. Like, I just sit there. And I am here. And I'm conscious. And I'm looking at the tree or I'm just not doing anything. It's about being right. This way of being. And it sounds like you're really beginning to learn to refuel yourself, and I think you have a lot to celebrate. That's actually the question I typically ask at the end of all of my coaching calls, and I'll ask you, if you were going to celebrate what's the one thing you want to celebrate most about your life by design? Or I should say about you, either one of those.

LIZZ RANTZE: 53:03

I'll like, I'll say I'm, I'm so funny. You can hear me stumbling. I'm literally like, letting myself feels weird. No, I will say I'm very proud of myself for acknowledging that something was wrong, something was not my life was there was something was definitely wrong. And I needed to change it. And I was the only one to do that. And I took the steps to do it. I will be proud of of that. Because it's hard. It's hard. It's still hard. It's hard if you're a person. And if you're listening, still listening to me babble on on this podcast. I will and you're going through something like that, where you feel lost. It's it's hard. And just taking the baby steps is really the only way to start getting out of it. And then one day, you just start feeling a little bit better. You just start seeing the light, you start noticing little magical things. It's just like, it just happens slowly. So I am very proud of myself that that I did it and then I've stuck to it. And then I've created something that people seem to be resonating with. And I'm just so grateful. I think that's the biggest thing is I'm just so grateful that this is happening, and I don't I don't know where it's going. But I'm just thankful. And I'm so thankful for the conversations like this with people like you. So yeah, that's those are things that's yes, good.

Nicoa Coach: 54:27

That's a great point, I want you to do that every day. When you pass a mirror, I want you to look in the mirror, and I want you to say I am grateful for this. And I'm celebrating me because of whatever. Because that's what we need more of self celebration and self love. And then that's a big fuel for being able to create whatever it is you give yourself permission to create. And I want you to know, I'm really proud of you. I watched your video where you say publicly, I'm proud of myself. Those little when you turn 40 I think it was your 40 birthday one,

LIZZ RANTZE: 55:03

you know that I I took that out of that video 50 times and I sat there wondering if I should post that for and I'm still not sure if I should have posted that part of it. Because I'm like, I'm crying. I said those words. I just feel so vulnerable. Yes, I totally judge. I love

Nicoa Coach: 55:19

that you did that. That was so that's what we all want to hear. I mean, I was bawling this week, talking about my mom with eye patches on you know, you know, trying to do some self care in the midst of packing for 12 hours in a day and I got more activity and interaction because I just was telling my truth. So keep telling your truth. You do have beautiful curated outcomes and I'm sure that part of this Is this plan for yours is to be able to market that skill? If you want people to I mean, I don't know, let me not assume you tell us. What is it that you hope to put out there for the world? Or you want people to come and follow you? Do you want people to hire you? Do you want to get put in a hand commercial? We talked about your hands being in that one fancy movie. I mean, these TVs really are the moneymakers. That's what I'm here for. My hand model. This is why they knew it. You probably make a shit ton more money.

LIZZ RANTZE: 56:26

I would say. I would say I'm still developing exactly where things are going. But for now, yes. I'm creating content on social media. I would love to connect with you on there. I'm at Liz Rance on Instagram and Tiktok. I have a lot of things I am working on behind the scenes that I can't quite talk about yet. So I have things rolling. So very slowly, but But yes, this is right now this is this is what I'm doing. And I just hope it provides some sort of value some sort of lightness in your day. Yeah, and we have a time a lot of shenanigans.

Nicoa Coach: 57:02

Lots of shenanigans, and I have had a blast having some shenanigans with you today. We can end with our ASMR

LIZZ RANTZE: 57:11

thank you so much, Nicola. Yeah, really.

Nicoa Coach: 57:15

As are you,

LIZZ RANTZE: 57:17

I do want to say before I go, this is really, really amazing that you're creating a space like this for, for your audience and for people because I've really wished that I would have found something like this when I was going through it. I feel like we all feel like our experience is exceptional. And this in this case, like losing yourself is not exceptional. A lot of people go through it. And it just is very helpful to feel like you're not the only one. You're not alone. So so thank you so much for having me. And thank you for creating this space. And this was a blast. It is a

Nicoa Coach: 57:48

blast. I wouldn't do it if I wasn't having fun. And thank you for saying all that. I really do believe it's an honor and a privilege to create a space and I am compelled. I just can't stop talking. All my friends are now rolling their eyes and my family is like, Mom, please. But I'm glad we're friends now. And I promise you, I'm going to check back in with you and see how you're doing with all that beautiful, curated self care and self love and I cannot wait to see what you put out next. I'm one of your biggest fans. Liz Rance, thank you for being on coffee with Nicoa and I will talk to you later. Love you. Thank

Unknown: 58:22

you so much. Bye bye. Thanks for joining us for a caffeinated conversation. Subscribe to Coffee with Nicoa for more stories from people living a life by design. You can also find inspiration on Instagram. Just follow Coffee with Nicoa and check out our website Coffee with nicoa.com and that's Nicoa N I CoA. We look forward to talking with you soon. And enjoy your coffee between now and then