Espresso Shot 4: Are you Negative Ned or Negative Nancy?

This week's Espresso Shot encourages you to take a look at your story and examine how you're telling it. Is it a positive story or a negative story? Are you getting out ahead of your own thoughts? You're words matter and so does your narrative. Like energy attracts like energy. What do YOU want to create in YOUR life by design?

Transcript

Unknown: 0:05

Hello, hello coffee with Nicoa, this is your weekly espresso shot coming to you from the banks of Whiskey Creek today. I know, that's usually where I always am. But I wanted to talk today about your story. How many of you walk around, say things like, Yes, I really wish I could do that, or that cost too much, or that must be nice. Or if only, or I just wish my boss would act like he's supposed to act, or she's just driving me insane. I can't get anything done because of her behavior, or whatever argument you have about your inability to move forward and get what you want. That my friends is your story. Okay, that's it. That's your espresso shot. I can remember when I was in the big corporate world as an HR executive, and I was frustrated with one of my leaders. And I kept saying, Well, I tried Yes, while I gave him the information, he just won't do it. Yeah, well, I'm totally just going to give up you know, forget it, I'm not even going to deal with it anymore. And now when I think back on that scenario, I'm actually embarrassed. I'm a bit appalled at my victimhood at my handcuffs, and, or at my continuous arguing for my limitations, being so focused on it, someone else's behavior that I never even once attempted, or I probably would have argued that I did. But maybe I had not attempted a different way. Or even if I had, clearly I had given up, my frustration levels got so high. That Yep, for those of you who've read my story, or heard this before, I quit my job. Literally in a meeting like no plan, like a crazy person. It was the best thing I ever did. But having said that, I was clearly seeing my world through a lens of victimhood. And I gave up, and that ultimately served me well. But I didn't do it in a way that served me in the moment. I didn't do it in a way that didn't burn a bridge. And I didn't do it in a way that saved me some money. My ego, and my story was that I was a victim to my circumstance, and that there were people to blame about that. And I want you to really think long and hard about the language and the story you tell every day. When you get a bill in the mail. Do you judge it by talking about it negatively? Oh, my God, I can't believe I forgot this bill was coming or this is just unexpected. This is so much money? Or do you simply open the bill? Notice the new information, just the facts, ma'am. And decide what you're going to do about it. Notice how heavy the negative judgment is, when you continuously apply it to your circumstances that you do not want. And then if you'd like to make a change, ladies and gentlemen, then let's talk about the opposite response. Not just negative, judgmental reactions about your life, like that guy is such a jerk. But Hmm, interesting. I didn't see this bill coming. Well, I'm really going to have to sit down and look at my situation and figure out what the options are here. Or, Wow, that guy sure is in a hurry. He cut me off in traffic. I hope everything's okay. I wonder what's on his mind today. Notice if you are defaulting to being the negative Nancy, or negative Ned of the world, and then I want you to look around your life and see how well it's serving you. Because if you are negative, and I'm not telling you to, well, I am kind of telling you to lie, cheat and steal, I want you to cheat and steal your way back up to the version of what is a different way. I can look at this. What is another meaning I can give to this. Ultimately, we're helping you take response ability by observing your story and asking yourself, How can I change my story? So it was more positive, more optimistic and not stuck in what is? How can I start looking for opportunities, being more empathetic, trying to put my feet in somebody else's shoes? What if I wasn't always making it about me? Yes. What if it wasn't all about me? And if I sat in the space of what is possible, maybe my life would be a little bit easier. And maybe my new story We start attracting. That's right. Like energy attracts like energy, like stories attract like stories. Yes. Maybe then I'd start to see the world and my life unfold exactly in the way that my deepest heart's desires have craved for so long. I can promise you once I stopped being the victim, and took response ability for my own story, you wouldn't believe how awesome the story has become. And I will tell you that I tell a brand new beautiful story every morning. So that's my last tip this week, every morning when you wake up clean sheet of paper, and what story are you going to write on that paper? That's just for you based on what is possible, not based on some sort of negative Nancy or negative Ned description of what is coffee with Nicoa. Thanks for listening