COFFEE WITH NICOA: Creating A LIFE BY DESIGN.

Espresso Shot 11: LIFE IS MEANINGLESS?

March 11, 2024 NICOA DUNNE CORNELIUS
COFFEE WITH NICOA: Creating A LIFE BY DESIGN.
Espresso Shot 11: LIFE IS MEANINGLESS?
COFFEE WITH NICOA: Creating A LIFE BY DESIGN. +
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Show Notes Transcript

Nicoa admits she did say once, "LIFE IS MEANINGLESS" to someone who didn't quite understand her point. It clearly left a mark on her way of BEING and SEEING the world - so she'd like to set the record straight about what she really means.  LISTEN in to this point of view about how we partner with ourselves to create MEANING in our LIFE BY DESIGN. What do YOU think?

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Nicoa Coach:

sometimes don't you just need a quick moment of inspiration. Or maybe you just need a moment of caffeinated contemplation to reflect on life. That's the idea behind my weekly coffee with Nicola espresso shots. I'll be sharing short jolts of inspiration in each clip, in addition to my longer Coffee with Nicoa interview episodes, make sure to subscribe so you never miss an espresso shot, or a full length Coffee with Nicoa interview created just for you. Ready for your weekly espresso shot? How many of you actually drink espresso? By the way, the other. The other night, we had a friend over she said, we're going to buy a new expresso machine. And I said not a few call it expressor. Let's be all let's take a moment. Let's all be clear. It is espresso. You can say it with me espresso, I have to share this information with you. Because this is coffee with Nicoa. And I rarely talk about coffee. So you know, there you go. Now we're up. We're up to speed. Okay, guys, we're talking about life. I know you saw the title. And you're like, What the What Nicoa You're the last person in the world I thought would say such a phrase. Life is meaningless. You know, I had a conversation with someone in my world about I bet it was 1515 20 years ago. And I was at a dinner table and sitting next to this person. And I said, you know, life really doesn't have any meaning, just the meaning we give it. And they freaked out. Not only did they freak out, and I found myself in somewhat of a philosophical debate with them that evening. But fast forward, like, I don't know, six or seven years later, they threw it back in my face this person. This is not my ex husband, this is not anybody that you would know, probably. But they said to me what you said once life is meaningless. And I said, Okay, I'm not sure you're getting my point here. So if you're confused, let me back this up and see if I can explain it to you. Here's how this thing called life works. You're here on this planet, in a physical body having a spiritual experience. So literally, this is the meat suit, right the channel in which you've come onto this earth, I don't have time to debate whether or not that's true or not just go with the assumption here just to get to my point. And you're having an experience, and you're having a sensory experience because you're in a body that experiences life based on its senses. So at a basic level, you are having a smelling experience a tasting experience, a hearing experience, a seeing experience. And and that is one way that we have a life here. Based on our senses, I invite you to come back to your senses. And recognize that there is one other very powerful piece of this experience, you are in a co creative partnership between your body. And that higher version of you that soulful version of you that spirit that is you. And with that CO partnership, you also create meaning. So every encounter you have, or as I like to say every action, every interaction, every reaction is based on the meaning that you give it. So basically, we're talking physics here, so like energy attracts like energy. I'm the only one who can give any type of meaning to something when I observe it. And I am giving it that meaning based on a lot of things. Most likely, I am giving meaning to inexperience based on everything I ever learned since the moment I was born on this planet. Right so every everything anybody ever said to me everything my parents trained me to believe what society told me to believe what my fifth grade teacher said to me that one time what that one boyfriend said or did or didn't do. All of that creates my perception of the world. And therefore, it gives me my meaning. So I will see something happen. Let's say someone cuts me off in traffic, or I have a fender bender, and I'm gonna make it mean something. Now depending on everything I've ever learned in my life, and my current life circumstances, so context does have have an influence here. But again, only if I give the context meaning. So somebody cuts me off and we have a fender bender. What is my first thought? Most likely, I'm in a stress reaction. Because I didn't see that coming. Wow, that might have been scary and upsetting and overwhelming. And therefore, I need your react to it. Oh my god, I can't believe that guy just hit me. Right? Or, Oh my God. Now again, depending on my life, and how I've been brought up, my first thought could be Oh, my God, what did I do wrong? Oh, my God, I crashed the car. When it very well could have been the other guy's fault? I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. It just depends on my perception, right? So you fast forward, you and the guy are out, you know, exchanging information, what's going through my head? So I'm in a stress reaction, and all of a sudden, I am spinning. And I am making it mean, oh, my god, I can't afford this right now. Or, you know, or I'm the caregiver. Oh, is that? Is he hurt that I hurt anybody? Am I hurt? Am I mad? am I yelling? What am I making it mean? Now you've heard me talk about this before. And if my kids are listening, they're like, Oh, my God. Mom, would you stop talking about this power of what am I making it me? Because we want more information about other things. Tell me what else you want me to talk about? Because I haven't been convinced yet that everybody's figured this one out. So if life is meaningless, until I give it meaning, wow, what does that tell you? I got a lot of power. I got a lot of influence. I'm quite liberated in this power of me having the ability to project meaning onto something. So guess what you're if I'm doing that, guess what everybody else has to? And you've noticed, right that I might make it mean one thing. And the guy next to me makes it mean someone else. Maybe he's like, Hey, I am so sorry, I did not see that light change. And it is totally my fault. I should have given you the right away. And I just want to apologize. And here's my information, and we'll take care of it. Wow. Wonder what he made it mean? Maybe I'm still over here being the victim, and I can't believe he did not want to be mad. Maybe I'm the fighter? What are you giving meaning to? And is there anything in your world that you're giving meaning to that you'd like to change the meaning that because it's not serving you. So let's break it down one more time before we wrap up. So we've got if you have a negative beliefs, and you are giving something a negative meaning you are going to get that return to you, it will be reflected back to you in the scenario most likely. So in that one example, if I come out fighting, I come out jumping out of that car Yellin carrying on. Hey, who knows that guy that wasn't making it mean anything for a hot minute, might start getting defensive, he might try to protect himself and maybe he starts yelling back. Like energy attracts like energy. Or if I come out with positive beliefs in my lifetime, and in that experience, I will get it reflected back to me most likely. There is power in the meaning you give. So the question really is can you observe yourself long enough to know if you are putting negative beliefs and meaning out into the world, or positive belief and meaning out into the world? It is basic physics because guess what the universe and the planet and other people, they're pretty much neutral except for the experiences they've had since birth. So everything's kind of neutral until you insert yourself into the scene. Think about that. Think about what you make it mean when you're grouchy teenager walks into the kitchen in the morning. What are you making it mean? And is your belief system negative or positive? This is your journaling prompt for the week. Pull out your pen. Go get your journal. And I want you to start reflecting on what the world is reflecting back to you. Coffee with Nicoa Thanks for listening. You guys. Have a great week. Make sure to subscribe so you never miss an espresso shot or a full length Coffee with Nicoa interview created just for you

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